Categories
Deconditioning Emotional & Non-Emotional Beings Essence Relationship

Who can not wait for me is not meant for me

Who can not wait for me is not meant for me

One of the biggest observations that I’ve had so far in the Human Design experiment is knowing that I am here to respect myself and respecting myself means to wait for my inner authority. This is the deepest respect that I can give to myself.This is one of the biggest expressions of self-love that I found for myself.
If other people cannot wait for me when I need more time I realize they simply aren’t for me. They are most likely amazing people and generous and loving and special human beings. If they are naturally in their behavior and state of mind they can not wait for me then on some level they cannot, right now, love me as I am.
If they are pushing me to act, if they are judging me or blaming me for the time I need it is not easy for me and is a message for me saying “well maybe they are not for you Bar”.
 
The people that can wait for me naturally that are not pushing me or judging me or blaming me for not behaving in a way they want me to behave, in a way they are saying to me “you are loved as you are, I am loving you as you are, you are welcome in your own timing.”
Especially for me as an Emotional Manifestor, this is very important because I really move on my own inner timing. Sometimes I really do need a long time to feel if something is right for me or not. For me, if someone is not respecting the waiting in a way it is a message that is saying: I am not trusting life, I’m not trusting divine timing, I’m not trusting that everything has its own place to exist and its particular timing.
For me, it is a deeper message than: You’re not fast enough or you’re not applying life the way I want it to be. This is a deeper message for me that says this person cannot let go of his/her mind.
 
This is something I am struggling with for myself, not allowing the mind to control my life so I don’t need people around me who still use the mind as an authority. In a way, it is even better for me to be around people who first, don’t respect the timing for me to move and second of all-seeing or thinking that the mind is an authority.
 
Again those people are not bad people or have bad intentions they are most probably amazing human beings but what I am asking myself are those people for me? Are they part of my specific journey? Do they fit the way I see life and want to behave in this life? Sometimes it is not easy to see people leaving and feel people abandoning my energetic field.
But I am here to trust my body, that it is leading me, my inner authority is leading me and whatever needs to happen is happening, maybe at the price of changing the environment and the people around me.
 
Whoever cannot wait for me is not for me. Maybe the mind wants to keep everyone around me and to be nice and polite and keep everything perfect and in place but the body knows and has no fear.
 
The body is completely satisfied with what is happening right now and the body trusts. Most probably it is the mind struggling and wanting me to be something that I am not. I am encouraging you to let go of people who cannot see you, understand you, or respect your inner authority. I am wishing myself to let go with love and compassion. It is not about them being wrong or not true to who they are. They are doing their journey and I am doing my journey so may we all be respected and respect the timing of the other. If there is no mutual respect maybe things need to change and unfold differently.
Categories
Centers Emotional & Non-Emotional Beings Relationship

Awareness points for Emotional Beings

Awareness points for Emotional Beings

One of my favorite topics in Human Design is the Solar Plexus, the emotional center, and the emotional being versus the non-emotional being. Today I would like to focus on the emotional being and a few things I was noticing along the way as an Emotional Manifestor.
Every year, every month, every week, every day there is a deeper and deeper understanding of what it is like to be an emotional being.
 
1)To connect to my emotions. It is not always easy to connect to what I feel. First, I would like to separate emotions and feelings. Emotions are the chemistry that rises up and down and feelings are the sensations in the body that come with the emotions. Allowing myself time during the day to connect to those emotions is not easy. To see how I can take the emotions from the head center to the throat center to the G center and down to the solar plexus in the area of the belly and the lower ribs. From my experience so far it takes time to dive into that trail of the body.
Literally like deep diving in the sea, it takes time to go down and to put the weight and equipment and make it down to the depths. The same applies to being an emotional being, it takes time to drop into your body and see what it feels.

2)Practical tool I would like to propose is a diary, internal or external, that goes from hope to pain. If you have a circumstance in your life or a decision you can just follow the good positive emotions and the negative emotions that come with it and make a diary.
I propose to put a sign on the wall or somewhere visible to you, with a word/ drawing of a decision or topic, or person.
Then you can come in front of it and see how you feel about it today and now?
Ask your mind not to judge if it is positive or negative if it relates to pain or pleasure. It’s simple like stepping into a room and see how you feel in this room each time.
You can do this physically on the wall or just simply do this within yourself.
It will obviously be a process, sometimes there will be a lot of pain relating to that person, decision, circumstances, sometimes much excitement and pleasure, or many questions and uncertainty.
This is actually the process of being an emotional being is to connect with something and to see what comes out of it emotionally and know that it will not be the same meaning whatever you feel now will change in a couple of minutes, hours and days. Just let the change be.

3)How to communicate emotions. I know that for me is has been a struggle and something I am still discovering is how to communicate what I feel to others using different vocabulary and different tools. What I have found is that before I even speak I want to find an emotional place within me, so I can talk from there. To find out how I connect to an emotional frequency within my body and then allow the words to go out from that place.
Many times I wanted to express something emotionally and I just did not have the words and I was not deeply in my emotional frequency in my body so although I had a really beautiful message to share with beautiful wisdom, it did not pass through because the frequency was not embodied in my emotions in the solar plexus. Some people are very sensitive to this and so am I. When I speak from a place of emotion that is connected to what I really experience then even if it is very hard it is easier to listen and to grasp what I try to express

4) Emotional being – do not give up on your emotional depth. Do not give up the wisdom and the details and the profound frequency that you each display in this life. It is not always easy to be that deep, that person that needs a lot of time but this is our gift! to be profound and deep. Touching the places that are part of the deepest landscape of our being, like touching the womb. Like touching under the earth.
Even though in our society half of us are emotional and the other half are non-emotional there is a tendency to talk in a very superficial way. When the emotional being is correct in their body and is embodying their own frequency, they are actually proposing more profound communication, something that needs time to reach.
So if I, as an emotional being, see that I need to talk fast in order to explain myself and I need to be superficial in order to connect with the other then I understand this form of communication is not for me because this is not my potential. My potential is to bring something deep and to see if there is a place for that depth.
Emotional beings – do not give up on your depth! because this is your gift, this is your potential, this is what you are here to bring. You are not here to bring a glass of water, you are here to bring the whole ocean to your creation, relationship, self, and into your daily presence.

Those are my awareness points for now. I hope they can empower you.
 
Categories
Centers Emotional & Non-Emotional Beings Relationship

The pain of the Emotional Being

The pain of the Emotional Being

Today I would like to share about the pain of an Emotional Being according to my experience and according to other Emotional Beings I am in contact with, as we shared the same pain.
We know that the Solar Plexus is the center that is responsible for the chemistry of emotions in our body and it is deeply related to pain and pleasure. It operates in waves and is all about taking the time to feel all the emotional details from life and let contemplation be. It is about time, depth, waiting, and allowing oneself to be the ocean.
I would like to share with you three points that have created pain and suffering in my life until slowly I discovered how I can embrace them and heal them.
 
1) Superficiality: As an emotional being I had a huge problem being superficial myself and having superficial interactions. As I had a deep need for depth and a deep need to go deep into whatever it is.
The pain was there because I saw around me the fear to go down deep into the experience. I felt that I needed to copy that and that I also needed to be superficial and to be smiling all the time and to be light and showing I am “ok”.This was part of the pain I was carrying until I met Human Design,the world seemed to me so superficial and I didn’t know how I fit in. Through time, through my experience and Human Design experiment, it is more that I allowed myself to be emotional than I became at peace with sometimes life will be superficial. I don’t always have the possibility or the option to go deep and this is completely fine.
This healing process was possible only when I was surrendering to my own depths and to my own waiting that I could accept superficiality and see the beauty of lightness and fun and things that are not so deep that are going faster.

2 ) Pressure of time: I noticed that this world can be very fast. People want a fast response or life is demanding that I act fast. I constantly felt under pressure and for an Emotional Being this can create a lot of inner anxiety and a lot of feelings of hurrying one process which is very very painful. The pain that comes when the outer environment is pressuring for answer and action while the inner environment, my inner authority, was not giving a green light to it.
The healing process included being okay with my own rhythm and my own timing no matter what is happening outside. This healing process continues building up as I am passing another day, another week, another month into the experiment.
I feel more and more comfortable taking my time and if this situation can not wait for me or the person can not wait for me then this thing is not for me. I learned to respect it. Today it feels completely different to know that I have my own world, my own timing, and my own timeframe to decide. I am here to respect and honor it, as it is my gift too.

3) Emotional understanding: As an Emotional Being I experience life constantly from the realm of emotions so everything for me is an emotional encounter or activity or circumstance. Everything is under the umbrella of emotions. For many years I was lacking emotional understanding. The resonance to the abstract world that I live in, I felt like I needed someone that can understand that. I felt lonely when I saw people around me looking for logic and looking for linear ways of thinking and looking at reality in a certain way while inside I felt many things are so abstract and emotional.
This healing process became very evident for me as I was deepening my own experience, I learned how to give myself this emotional expression and I also met people who understand this emotional expression. Finally, I could bond through that realm. What I learned through my experience is that when I bring this kind of perspective people can understand it but I can not expect other people to bring it if it is not part of who they are. I felt a big relief to bring emotional understanding to myself and then also to see that people can relate to it.
As more self-love came and appreciation and the ability to understand and feel me then I could give more space to the abstraction to the way I lived and I also found allies and a way to communicate this emotional life that I live.
 
4) How to gather all the information: I feel so many things and I constantly live my life through emotions, my emotions, the emotions of others. I live in such an abstract world that is full of emotions and water sensations, images and colors, I didn’t know how to gather all of it together? I felt frustrated not being able to embrace all the details and the nuances that shape me. This was a very deep pain for me to feel that I don’t succeed to bring everything together that is complete and makes it possible for me to grasp.
Through my healing process, I became more relaxed within and I learned how to accumulate all the data from the physical realm, the mental realm, and the emotional realm, and through time I learned how to express all the details of it when the time comes.
I was practicing a lot on how I verbalize to myself my inner world and to other people what I perceive. Now I allow myself the time to accumulate and to accumulate and to accumulate the data that I have received and let it sink with patience.
I learned to trust that through time I will see the picture and it will make sense and that my body and life will show me the magic of the whole. I feel I have expanded and I have the ability to embrace, through waiting and through time, all the nuances and all the emotional realities that I live in.
 
I hope this was beneficial for people that are emotional to connect to your pain because we as emotional people can allow pain and it is not something that scares us. Allowing the pain of superficiality and allowing the pain of being under pressure and stress and allowing the pain of not being understood emotionally and allowing the pain of how all the details will be gathered. Just accepting and giving space to that pain and from there I believe there is always a healing process and deep beautiful completion. Once there is an acceptance of what is painful there is also a possibility for transformation.
Categories
Emotional & Non-Emotional Beings Manifestors

Getting a critique as a Manifestor

Getting a critique as a Manifestor

Let’s start with a little story, a few days ago I had an emotional confrontation / issue with a person and I felt it was accurate and needed, and profound. It was not easy to express it though it felt necessary in order for things to develop in the relationship.

After the conversation was over, I got a rebound for that person. I was told that the talk was good and it was spot on but the way I opened it, the first step of opening it up, the way I started the conversation was shocking and aggressive. I guess something in my voice was radical, not subtle or sensitive enough?  My first reaction to the critique was: :” What!? look at what I brought us, look at the impact I give us here. look at the emotional truth that I share with you. Nobody can do it for us!” 

Then I kept on listening inside. I discovered that actually, I was feeling the not self-anger from the Manifestor wounded inner child that felt not appreciated. 

Then I let this feeling sink into my body and I let everything be as it is. I was crying a bit. Then I understood that this person is actually teaching me to be a better Manifestor.  This person is teaching me that if I want to touch the hearts of people, If I want to bring the correct impact and really initiate people from a loving place,  then I need to learn from the rebound that I get, from the critique that I get back afterwords.  

It is not easy as a Manifestor,  because I feel I don’t want to be controlled, being told what and how to do. It is true that I don’t need to take all of the critiques, I can choose what I take in and what not.  What is relevant and  waht is not relevant. I believe a relationship between people is something I grow through and with it. 

 Especially as a Manifestor, I live in this closed and repelling aura, sometimes people have the feeling that they cannot reach me, they cannot tell me anything. Maybe I got used to the fact that nobody dares say anything to me as I am “Bar”,  this creature that cannot be touched, but then when people do say, it can be painful because I am not used to it, though nowdays I deeply appreciate that because I also want to evolve.  I also want to learn and get closer to myself and others. I want to open my heart. I also want to be loved by other people and to show my love and be vulnerable.  

So Manifestor’s critique is important. Can you see what is your state in ,moment that you receive one?, how open are you to receiving this critique?  It may be painful. It might not be so casual to hear critiques, because so many people are going away from us and being repelled by this aura.  When people do come and say a critique I think it is valuable to take a moment and listen.

Maybe not in the same moment I can understand how valuable it is, but maybe over time I may take it in my way. If I want to make an impact, if I want to reach the hearts of the people, I would like to be open to what comes back and how?

 I believe most Manifestors want to create an impact that is beautiful, inspiring and that brings the right change, to initiate from love, so critique is part of the process. 

But I know that for me as a Manifestor,  receiving critique, and feedback, and rebound, it is not always going to be easy. Though I see it as a necessary step, in order to evolve as a Manifestor and as a person. 

Conflict, arguments or disagreements, sometimes are making me stronger and they are making me more aware,  also making me softer. They demand from me to ask deeper questions and not just to take things  as they are. Saying: ”I am like this, I am initiating like a bulldog!” but actually to say:” No, I can refine myself. I can see where I am wrong, I can be wrong.  It doesn’t mean anything about the person that I am, It just means that I am a human being, I can be wrong as well as a Manifestor and I can be powerful and wrong.” 

 When the Manifestor with the energy of the king or queen, untouchable, puts his/her head down for a moment and says; “ I’m sorry I didn’t see that.  Thank you for showing me that. I think it is an example of being a creature with a lot of inner true force and humility at the same time.

I hope it can contribute to your own process as a human and as a Manifestor.  

Categories
Centers Emotional & Non-Emotional Beings Relationship

Awareness-Practical points for Non-Emotional Beings

Awareness-Practical points for Non-Emotional Beings

I am an Emotional Manifestor but since entering the experiment I have had a lot of intimate relationships with people who are undefined or completely open in their solar plexus. In Human Design we call it “Non-Emotional beings”. As I am constantly exploring Human design I am constantly looking for more awareness and understanding between us, the humans. I was kind of forced to look at the dynamics between emotional and non-emotional.
Life took me to these kinds of relationships to explore and to observe. I was observing and recognizing a few points of awareness that may support the Non-Emotional beings.
 
1) Identify You identify when there is an emotional frequency in the space, you will feel a vibration that is present in the moment. So as Non-Emotional being the first step is to identify that something is “strange” in the atmosphere. Recognizing that until now everything was kind of okay like fluid water and then suddenly there is an emotion that creates a more condensed flow.
Emotion is something that is very condensed and very evident that is influencing its surroundings easily, so you want to give it space and attention and not be surprised by it. It can be a low wave or high wave but something in the density of the air will change and see if you can make sure to identify it. For each one it will be different, maybe you will feel it in the physicality, maybe you will feel it in your solar plexus itself. Maybe you will feel it in your belly or your eyes, so see what physical symptoms you can identify? Maybe you could also identify certain thoughts you have when this particular emotional frequency is entering into the picture? As you know the tendency of the not-self of the undefined/ open solar plexus is to avoid confrontation and truth, so the first step into meeting gracefully this conditioning and transforming it into wisdom is to say:” I know it is here, I don’t need to run away or act, I just identify the difference, that it is present now”.

2 ) Simple sentence Then you will go to the empathy part. If you are with someone emotional, you will know what the other feels on some level. What can be useful is just to imagine what the other might feel, and saying it words, in simple short sentences. If it’s pain, confusion, disappointment, joy, passion and just verbalizing it for yourself, ask yourself :” how can I enter into the world of the other and understand how it feels and make it simple?” .Because emotional frequency can be at times very abstract and hard to describe.
When you understand the other and make it simple for yourself, only then you can bring empathy, and it starts to be less frightening, if not it is just overwhelming. If you verbalize for yourself what is happening on the other side you are actually telling your body:” this was not here and now it is here, what is it?” You are entering into a mode of curiosity instead of fear and rejection and separation. When you start this inner inquiry it will feel more familiar and more comfortable to allow it to show you something instead of running away or entering into it roughly which are the two possibilities that the undefined/open solar plexus people are doing when they not self if active.

3) What is right for me – You recognized there is a change, you asked yourself what the other might be feeling and gave it words and then check with yourself – How are you about this? Do you need more time? Maybe it is not the time for you to feel something very exciting or something very low? Maybe later and maybe not at all? Just allowing yourself to dance with the possibilities and knowing you have the choice and you can observe the choice that is emerging out of your Inner Authority.

4) Communicate : once you are clear then you can communicate it to the other, for example, to say ”there is something here I need a moment/ there is something here let’s talk about it later / there is something here I don’t want to talk about or anything at all right now.” It is a way to respect your capacity at the moment and what is healthy for your body.

5) Inner Wisdom What I learned about myself? We can all learn from each other and if you as a Non-Emotional being experience an emotion from out side, either very high or very low, it is coming to show you something about yourself as well!.
It is true that it is not a constant frequency in your body and you should not make decisions from it but you can for sure learn something about yourself. You can learn about your own sorrow and hidden pain. You can learn about your own capacity to express joy and excitement and love.

When you step out of the situation or the situation is over, you can ask yourself :” what did I learn from this encounter? ” The tendencyI observed with Non-Emtotional beings is to say “This is not mine and I just continue and do things my way!!” but I don’t believe that human interaction is happening in order for us to just neglect each other. The essence in my experience is to learn from one another as I learn from each of my undefined and open centers.