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Centers Emotional & Non-Emotional Beings Relationship

The pain of the Emotional Being

The pain of the Emotional Being

Today I would like to share about the pain of an Emotional Being according to my experience and according to other Emotional Beings I am in contact with, as we shared the same pain.
We know that the Solar Plexus is the center that is responsible for the chemistry of emotions in our body and it is deeply related to pain and pleasure. It operates in waves and is all about taking the time to feel all the emotional details from life and let contemplation be. It is about time, depth, waiting, and allowing oneself to be the ocean.
I would like to share with you three points that have created pain and suffering in my life until slowly I discovered how I can embrace them and heal them.
 
1) Superficiality: As an emotional being I had a huge problem being superficial myself and having superficial interactions. As I had a deep need for depth and a deep need to go deep into whatever it is.
The pain was there because I saw around me the fear to go down deep into the experience. I felt that I needed to copy that and that I also needed to be superficial and to be smiling all the time and to be light and showing I am “ok”.This was part of the pain I was carrying until I met Human Design,the world seemed to me so superficial and I didn’t know how I fit in. Through time, through my experience and Human Design experiment, it is more that I allowed myself to be emotional than I became at peace with sometimes life will be superficial. I don’t always have the possibility or the option to go deep and this is completely fine.
This healing process was possible only when I was surrendering to my own depths and to my own waiting that I could accept superficiality and see the beauty of lightness and fun and things that are not so deep that are going faster.

2 ) Pressure of time: I noticed that this world can be very fast. People want a fast response or life is demanding that I act fast. I constantly felt under pressure and for an Emotional Being this can create a lot of inner anxiety and a lot of feelings of hurrying one process which is very very painful. The pain that comes when the outer environment is pressuring for answer and action while the inner environment, my inner authority, was not giving a green light to it.
The healing process included being okay with my own rhythm and my own timing no matter what is happening outside. This healing process continues building up as I am passing another day, another week, another month into the experiment.
I feel more and more comfortable taking my time and if this situation can not wait for me or the person can not wait for me then this thing is not for me. I learned to respect it. Today it feels completely different to know that I have my own world, my own timing, and my own timeframe to decide. I am here to respect and honor it, as it is my gift too.

3) Emotional understanding: As an Emotional Being I experience life constantly from the realm of emotions so everything for me is an emotional encounter or activity or circumstance. Everything is under the umbrella of emotions. For many years I was lacking emotional understanding. The resonance to the abstract world that I live in, I felt like I needed someone that can understand that. I felt lonely when I saw people around me looking for logic and looking for linear ways of thinking and looking at reality in a certain way while inside I felt many things are so abstract and emotional.
This healing process became very evident for me as I was deepening my own experience, I learned how to give myself this emotional expression and I also met people who understand this emotional expression. Finally, I could bond through that realm. What I learned through my experience is that when I bring this kind of perspective people can understand it but I can not expect other people to bring it if it is not part of who they are. I felt a big relief to bring emotional understanding to myself and then also to see that people can relate to it.
As more self-love came and appreciation and the ability to understand and feel me then I could give more space to the abstraction to the way I lived and I also found allies and a way to communicate this emotional life that I live.
 
4) How to gather all the information: I feel so many things and I constantly live my life through emotions, my emotions, the emotions of others. I live in such an abstract world that is full of emotions and water sensations, images and colors, I didn’t know how to gather all of it together? I felt frustrated not being able to embrace all the details and the nuances that shape me. This was a very deep pain for me to feel that I don’t succeed to bring everything together that is complete and makes it possible for me to grasp.
Through my healing process, I became more relaxed within and I learned how to accumulate all the data from the physical realm, the mental realm, and the emotional realm, and through time I learned how to express all the details of it when the time comes.
I was practicing a lot on how I verbalize to myself my inner world and to other people what I perceive. Now I allow myself the time to accumulate and to accumulate and to accumulate the data that I have received and let it sink with patience.
I learned to trust that through time I will see the picture and it will make sense and that my body and life will show me the magic of the whole. I feel I have expanded and I have the ability to embrace, through waiting and through time, all the nuances and all the emotional realities that I live in.
 
I hope this was beneficial for people that are emotional to connect to your pain because we as emotional people can allow pain and it is not something that scares us. Allowing the pain of superficiality and allowing the pain of being under pressure and stress and allowing the pain of not being understood emotionally and allowing the pain of how all the details will be gathered. Just accepting and giving space to that pain and from there I believe there is always a healing process and deep beautiful completion. Once there is an acceptance of what is painful there is also a possibility for transformation.
Categories
Emotional & Non-Emotional Beings Manifestors

Getting a critique as a Manifestor

Getting a critique as a Manifestor

Let’s start with a little story, a few days ago I had an emotional confrontation / issue with a person and I felt it was accurate and needed, and profound. It was not easy to express it though it felt necessary in order for things to develop in the relationship.

After the conversation was over, I got a rebound for that person. I was told that the talk was good and it was spot on but the way I opened it, the first step of opening it up, the way I started the conversation was shocking and aggressive. I guess something in my voice was radical, not subtle or sensitive enough?  My first reaction to the critique was: :” What!? look at what I brought us, look at the impact I give us here. look at the emotional truth that I share with you. Nobody can do it for us!” 

Then I kept on listening inside. I discovered that actually, I was feeling the not self-anger from the Manifestor wounded inner child that felt not appreciated. 

Then I let this feeling sink into my body and I let everything be as it is. I was crying a bit. Then I understood that this person is actually teaching me to be a better Manifestor.  This person is teaching me that if I want to touch the hearts of people, If I want to bring the correct impact and really initiate people from a loving place,  then I need to learn from the rebound that I get, from the critique that I get back afterwords.  

It is not easy as a Manifestor,  because I feel I don’t want to be controlled, being told what and how to do. It is true that I don’t need to take all of the critiques, I can choose what I take in and what not.  What is relevant and  waht is not relevant. I believe a relationship between people is something I grow through and with it. 

 Especially as a Manifestor, I live in this closed and repelling aura, sometimes people have the feeling that they cannot reach me, they cannot tell me anything. Maybe I got used to the fact that nobody dares say anything to me as I am “Bar”,  this creature that cannot be touched, but then when people do say, it can be painful because I am not used to it, though nowdays I deeply appreciate that because I also want to evolve.  I also want to learn and get closer to myself and others. I want to open my heart. I also want to be loved by other people and to show my love and be vulnerable.  

So Manifestor’s critique is important. Can you see what is your state in ,moment that you receive one?, how open are you to receiving this critique?  It may be painful. It might not be so casual to hear critiques, because so many people are going away from us and being repelled by this aura.  When people do come and say a critique I think it is valuable to take a moment and listen.

Maybe not in the same moment I can understand how valuable it is, but maybe over time I may take it in my way. If I want to make an impact, if I want to reach the hearts of the people, I would like to be open to what comes back and how?

 I believe most Manifestors want to create an impact that is beautiful, inspiring and that brings the right change, to initiate from love, so critique is part of the process. 

But I know that for me as a Manifestor,  receiving critique, and feedback, and rebound, it is not always going to be easy. Though I see it as a necessary step, in order to evolve as a Manifestor and as a person. 

Conflict, arguments or disagreements, sometimes are making me stronger and they are making me more aware,  also making me softer. They demand from me to ask deeper questions and not just to take things  as they are. Saying: ”I am like this, I am initiating like a bulldog!” but actually to say:” No, I can refine myself. I can see where I am wrong, I can be wrong.  It doesn’t mean anything about the person that I am, It just means that I am a human being, I can be wrong as well as a Manifestor and I can be powerful and wrong.” 

 When the Manifestor with the energy of the king or queen, untouchable, puts his/her head down for a moment and says; “ I’m sorry I didn’t see that.  Thank you for showing me that. I think it is an example of being a creature with a lot of inner true force and humility at the same time.

I hope it can contribute to your own process as a human and as a Manifestor.  

Categories
Centers Emotional & Non-Emotional Beings Relationship

Awareness-Practical points for Non-Emotional Beings

Awareness-Practical points for Non-Emotional Beings

I am an Emotional Manifestor but since entering the experiment I have had a lot of intimate relationships with people who are undefined or completely open in their solar plexus. In Human Design we call it “Non-Emotional beings”. As I am constantly exploring Human design I am constantly looking for more awareness and understanding between us, the humans. I was kind of forced to look at the dynamics between emotional and non-emotional.
Life took me to these kinds of relationships to explore and to observe. I was observing and recognizing a few points of awareness that may support the Non-Emotional beings.
 
1) Identify You identify when there is an emotional frequency in the space, you will feel a vibration that is present in the moment. So as Non-Emotional being the first step is to identify that something is “strange” in the atmosphere. Recognizing that until now everything was kind of okay like fluid water and then suddenly there is an emotion that creates a more condensed flow.
Emotion is something that is very condensed and very evident that is influencing its surroundings easily, so you want to give it space and attention and not be surprised by it. It can be a low wave or high wave but something in the density of the air will change and see if you can make sure to identify it. For each one it will be different, maybe you will feel it in the physicality, maybe you will feel it in your solar plexus itself. Maybe you will feel it in your belly or your eyes, so see what physical symptoms you can identify? Maybe you could also identify certain thoughts you have when this particular emotional frequency is entering into the picture? As you know the tendency of the not-self of the undefined/ open solar plexus is to avoid confrontation and truth, so the first step into meeting gracefully this conditioning and transforming it into wisdom is to say:” I know it is here, I don’t need to run away or act, I just identify the difference, that it is present now”.

2 ) Simple sentence Then you will go to the empathy part. If you are with someone emotional, you will know what the other feels on some level. What can be useful is just to imagine what the other might feel, and saying it words, in simple short sentences. If it’s pain, confusion, disappointment, joy, passion and just verbalizing it for yourself, ask yourself :” how can I enter into the world of the other and understand how it feels and make it simple?” .Because emotional frequency can be at times very abstract and hard to describe.
When you understand the other and make it simple for yourself, only then you can bring empathy, and it starts to be less frightening, if not it is just overwhelming. If you verbalize for yourself what is happening on the other side you are actually telling your body:” this was not here and now it is here, what is it?” You are entering into a mode of curiosity instead of fear and rejection and separation. When you start this inner inquiry it will feel more familiar and more comfortable to allow it to show you something instead of running away or entering into it roughly which are the two possibilities that the undefined/open solar plexus people are doing when they not self if active.

3) What is right for me – You recognized there is a change, you asked yourself what the other might be feeling and gave it words and then check with yourself – How are you about this? Do you need more time? Maybe it is not the time for you to feel something very exciting or something very low? Maybe later and maybe not at all? Just allowing yourself to dance with the possibilities and knowing you have the choice and you can observe the choice that is emerging out of your Inner Authority.

4) Communicate : once you are clear then you can communicate it to the other, for example, to say ”there is something here I need a moment/ there is something here let’s talk about it later / there is something here I don’t want to talk about or anything at all right now.” It is a way to respect your capacity at the moment and what is healthy for your body.

5) Inner Wisdom What I learned about myself? We can all learn from each other and if you as a Non-Emotional being experience an emotion from out side, either very high or very low, it is coming to show you something about yourself as well!.
It is true that it is not a constant frequency in your body and you should not make decisions from it but you can for sure learn something about yourself. You can learn about your own sorrow and hidden pain. You can learn about your own capacity to express joy and excitement and love.

When you step out of the situation or the situation is over, you can ask yourself :” what did I learn from this encounter? ” The tendencyI observed with Non-Emtotional beings is to say “This is not mine and I just continue and do things my way!!” but I don’t believe that human interaction is happening in order for us to just neglect each other. The essence in my experience is to learn from one another as I learn from each of my undefined and open centers.
 
Categories
Bar's Experience Deconditioning Relationship

My relationship with my parents after meeting Human Design and starting the deconditioning process.

My relationship with my parents after meeting Human Design and starting the deconditioning process.

I was asked recently about family relationships and meeting Human Design. I feel both very triggered and also inspired to answer this kind of question.
When I met Human Design I informed my parents about it very radically. I told them I need to be informed and I need time and I need space. And they didn’t really understand why. I tried to explain Human Design to them and they thought that it sounded crazy and wondered if it’s a kind of religion. But luckily they also respected me. They understood that Human Design is something that I’m going through. It’s something that I’m inspired by. And because of that understanding, they respected it.
 
In the beginning, it was quite hard. I am an Emotional Manifestor and so I asked them to tell me things in advance. I said “no” to a lot of their invitations or questions. It wasn’t easy for them because they felt like I was pushing them away. And I did push them away. I pushed them away because this experience was something new and I felt triggered when I was around them.
 
John Martin, my projector guide, calls the family, “the crime scene’ because the family is where we initially got conditioned. Because of this conditioning, a lot of the triggers can be provoked when we are close to our father, mother, siblings. We may have triggers that would not appear outside our family when we are amongst our relations. This is how it was for me in the first two years of the experiment. When I was close to my parents I became angrier, I became more impatient. It was hard for me to respect my Inner Authority. When I was around people who were not so close it was easier for me to practice my Strategy and Authority.
 
But life is mysterious and amazing and over the years, as I became more loyal to my body and have relaxed more, I see I have my own journey and they have theirs. I am actually now closer to my parents and now I’m even living close to them. Today we are almost in daily contact.
And I think I would never have had this opportunity to be so close to my parents without Human Design. It’s been a healing process with them. Human Design knowledge helped me to explain to them what I went through before I met Human Design. I explained to them why I was so isolated, why I was so angry and why I needed my space. This was news to them, they didn’t know all of this about me. They didn’t know how lonely I had felt or how confused I had been in the world. I was able to tell them, “thanks to Human Design I am starting to understand what is happening in me. Why I feel the way I do and what the difference is between me and other people.” I couldn’t have explained this in that way, in such a calm way, in such an abstract emotional way, without Human Design.
 
It’s been almost 5 years that I have been in the Human Design experiment. And I see it’s a process. I can really see myself entering into Human Design. Pushing everybody away so I can embody ‘this’ Emotional Manifestor being that I am. I see the other sometimes being hurt – not understanding what is happening between us. And then me getting softer and softer and then getting closer to them. I see myself explaining myself and apologizing and then establishing a new relationship. I see the process of us now making jokes about it and being able to contribute from my knowledge about Human Design to their process.
 
For me, it’s definitely a trajectory. A trajectory of getting into myself and pushing everybody away so I can hear my Inner Authority. So I can feel my body. And I knew I trusted Human Design. I knew that this process was so valuable and I knew that the peace that I feel in my body is right. And I knew, “I just have to be patient!”
And I was patient. It was very hard. I knew I was going to get “there”. I knew I was not going to stay distant from others forever. I knew I was not going to stay angry forever. I knew that so long as I am healing myself through Strategy and Authority, so long as I am living correctly I will be able to heal the relationship between myself and my parents and my brother as well.
 
And it’s been amazing. Now I can be around my parents, who before I could not stand to be with for more than 2 hours, and I love them.
Now I can help them and we can collaborate together and I also like to spend time with my mother and my father apart. Every two weeks we have an emotional talk when things are released. I see that my parents didn’t know ‘me’, an Emotional Manifestor, 6/2, at all before Human Design. They didn’t know how to get close to me and I didn’t know how to explain what was happening in my body. Now I know how I feel and what I need.
 
I hope that anyone else who is beginning this process with their parents can be patient with them. I wish that when I met Human Design I could have told my parents that I was going through something very meaningful to me.
I wish I could have told them that I need space and time and I need them to be soft and humble with me. And I wish I could have promised them that when the time comes, I will be ready to get closer to them. I couldn’t say these things to my parents. I could not communicate gently to my parents what I was going through and I feel really sad remembering that.
 
Another thing is, if you are into Human Design and you feel it is challenging for you to communicate with your parents, I recommend talking to them in ‘Human’ language and not in ‘Human Design’ language. For people who are not in Human Design, in my experience, it’s just too weird for them to understand. It’s too weird to say, ‘Hey look, I’m a Manifestor, you’re a Projector blah blah blah.’ for them It’s like, ‘what the?!’ So I recommend that you talk to them using normal language and just say something like, “I’m going through a transformation, I’m using a new tool, I need support here. I’m sorry if sometimes I’m not clear or I have some emotional reaction.” You can ask the other, “please respect what I ask you if you can. And if you do not want to respect my process please understand that I might want to get away from you because I need this for myself.” You can let the other know that you trust that this process will eventually take you deeper into connection.
 
I wish this was the way that I had talked to my parents when I met Human Design, but at the time I couldn’t. But we are always wiser today than yesterday. I want to support and empower your process to be more humble and soft and to help you to explain Human Design in an accessible way to your parents.
I really believe we can heal ourselves through healing the parent/child relationship. Because a lot of our conditioning is deeply related to our parents.
 
I can really see how the gates of my father are literally in my brain. I can feel how the splenic fears of my mother are here in my body. And through Strategy and Authority and through pain release and correct communication and patience I know it gets better.
From my experience, it has gotten better and better and I am so glad that my parents are not going to die without me loving and appreciating them. I’m so glad that we have a mutual understanding. I’m so glad that there can be a healing process between a child and their parents. I know so many people that lost their parents without doing this communication. Or who are not in a healthy relationship with their parents? I believe that we are all connected. You know it’s a connection and it’s a blood connection and there are wounds that are to be healed and there are lessons to be learned.
 
I am so grateful for Human Design. And I’m grateful to myself for being in my process. And I’m grateful to my parents for being open and for taking me back to their arms over and over again. I feel like I am regaining my childhood. I feel like I am regaining my parents.
I wish you all a lot of luck on your journey with your parents. It requires a lot of patience but we are on the right track. “I am on the right track!” This is what I told myself, even when I was angry and upset, I said to myself, I am on the right track. It’s going well. Yes, It’s slow. But I’m on the right track.
Categories
Bar's Experience Deconditioning Essence

What is my place and role in the big picture? How does it feel to live it?

What is my place and role in the big picture? How does it feel to live it?

Let’s have a little moment to talk about the our role and the piece that we are in the big picture.
 
When I am true and loyal to the body, I can just see where I fit and what my role and job are in the big program.
Before I met Human Design, I felt that I hadn’t fit in. There was everything: the world, so many people, so many directions and things that could be done, so much to heal. I was wondering about my own role and place in that human roller coaster. After meeting Human Design, I started following my Inner Authority, I started respecting my aura, and step by step It felt like I was entering a ray of light that was dedicated only to me.

The beauty is that each person in this world has this ray of light that is capable of meeting people who need to encounter this light. Only the body knows that. The mind can not grasp my direction, who I need to meet and when I need to go, and why. The mind can not understand the timing of it. It’s too complex.

We have a magnetic monopole located in the G center and it just takes us in space. Each one of us can find their exact location and this is what we call “limitation”. It’s not about being everything, it’s not about being who we want to be – it’s about being exactly who we are meant to be. Then It feels effortless.

I must say that thanks to Human Design I felt like I could find my place. As an emotional Manifestor, I had always felt a bit alienated not knowing what to do with all the generators and projectors … I questioned where I belonged? and if I could even belong?

And my answer is yes, there is a space for everybody. But this space can be felt only when the red is in charge, only when I am in line with the form. And it takes a while like everything. It takes a while to enter this path. And the beauty is, again, that there’s a place for everybody.
People are saying that there is not enough money, not enough food, not enough this, not enough that. In my view, there is a place for everybody and enough for everybody. There is a place and energy that is sufficient for everybody.

We are a little piece in a big masterpiece. We can only perform our role. When we are in our role in accordance with our profile, channels, gates, and all the lines, it doesn’t take any effort. It’s just like a falling leaf, like a growing tree, like a blooming flower.