Month: January 2021

Categories
Manifestors

Manifestor – Owning my leadership

Manifestor - Owning my leadership

According to Ra, Manifestors used to be the rulers of this planet. Kings and queens that would give orders to people in order to create civilizations with their words. They were strong and powerful, being they are the only type that can move energy in that way.

No Longer Kings & Queens

I know, things have changed. Kingdoms and authorities have transformed. The Manifestor has become one of the ordinary people, no more a special ruler, no more above. Now the projectors will become new leaders because they are not leading big audiences, they are leading the individual. As we know we are about to enter a new period of time and awareness on this planet that belongs to the individual, and through the individual, we will feel the whole. Through the uniqueness of oneself we will feel how we are united.
Even though things have changed and the Manifestor is like everybody else. The blood is still royal blood, the Aura is still impacting. Otherwise, we would have been dead as a species already. But we are here Manifestors, yes we are still here.
The leadership of the Manifestor is different, yet very present and necessary. As a Manifestor, I’m not here to push or dictate anything through extra force. I’m here to collaborate and to use the force for the benefits of others. I’m here to use the leadership capacities to contribute to who is needed.

Impact as a contribution

Few month ago I’ve been collaborating with a beautiful Emotional Projector, and it is the first time that I could really grasp what it means to move things for others and not only for myself. Then I could understand, once again, that the energy that passes through is a service for all the others.
Over the years I’ve encouraged other Manifestors to take their leadership (and I still do), to not to be afraid of their own power or of their own Manifestor beauty. Not out of arrogance, not as power control. The opposite – feeling it as the art of contributing, the ability to recognize oneself in its higher capacities, and not from the understanding that we are separate or that someone is stronger or bigger. The opposite – from the understanding that we are all one thing and each one. When playing by its rules are actually allowing the flow to be, allowing the movement to expand. This is actually participating in the dance of life.
As a Manifestor I’m not here to hide, although I was conditioned to. I’m here to lead with grace, to own and practice the ability to give out of an authentic place, a place of peace and calmness, a place of passion and desire, a place of joy.

Starting from oneself
 
True leadership starts with the leadership of oneself, it becomes more beautiful each time it meets the other. When the impact touches the hearts of others, the body, the soul, the essence of the other.
Because as we all know there is no separation among us, it is just a reflection of oneself, and the Manifestor represents the reflection and the frequency of explosive creation, of pure energetical leadership. That doesn’t come from the mind, it comes from a deep respect to the body. It comes from within.
When I actually take this leadership, I see what it means to be responsible. I see what it means to be kind and see the other deeply. I see that it is not only about me, it never was only about me. When this understanding sinks into the body, I can grasp that the impact is part of a larger movement, nothing personal. I participate in the game, as me, just a small piece in a masterpiece.
My Manifestor energy belongs to all. It just passes through me.The forces that are passing through me found this body. So I am, in different forms, here to initiate, to take action when needed, to just wait when needed, and to be the agent of the stars on the planet of the human beings.
Categories
Bar's Experience Deconditioning Essence

Letting go & Healing

Letting go & Healing

I have the flu. My body is tired and weak, and my throat aches.
Yet, underneath these physical symptoms there is a sense of deep happiness. Once again life is teaching me to let go. Teaching me to drop into the unknown and do nothing.
I wonder, when was the last time I actually rested calmly on the sofa and read a book?
When was the last time I asked for support and care with no resistance ?
When was the last time I allowed myself to feel completely vulnerable?
It is amazing to observe the mind trying to resist what is hapenning , judging the body, analyzing, feeling guilty about not being enthusiastic and energetic.

For me, this IS Human Design: constantly seeing the story of the conditioning of the mind vs the movement of the body.
Ten years ago, I left my home, the beautiful village where I grew up. In the last few months, since I returned, I have been going through an intense period of deep pain-pleasure. I feel like I came back here to heal. I came back to my childhood memories, to be close to my parents. I came back to experience again the landscape and nature of my youth.
Every few days, since my return, I have been experiencing a new emotional crisis. I cry. I guess this should come as no surprise seeing that I have Gate 36 in my design. This week something suddenly shifted. I have started to see my upheaval from a new perspective. I am realizing that the old, painful wounds which have been resurfacing are actually an integral part of my process to letting go and ultimately healing. And it does not surprise me that I see this as being directly connected to next month, when I will be officially on the roof as a 6/2 profile (more on that in another post). I am, bit by bit, allowing myself to be loved by my family and my beautiful friends. I am slowly surrendering to a peaceful and modest lifestyle.

This process actually started four and half years ago when I was first introduced to Human Design, and I became acquainted with the essance that I AM NOT DOING ANYTHING, RATHER IT IS ALL HAPPENING TO ME. I enterted my experiment radically, and the road has been long and painful. Seeing the change – “allowing” my mind to stop running my life, and hasn’t been a walk in the park! But there are not shortcuts, not for anyone.

I look back on my radical journey, and retrace its steps. Steps which have finally brought me to this very moment of happiness. Happy that I am sick! Not because I enjoy feeling physically depleted, but rather that what is happening to me is meant to happen, in order to teach me to have complete trust and acceptance of this process. And although my mind still continues to fight for control, and the body sometimes gives in, the body, more than ever, quickly and swiftly regains its rightful place to navigate its movement on this earthly plane.
 
And I watch myself, go through the deconditioning of my life’s journey of wounds, gifts, and experiences. It is truly amazing to live this life AND
As I said, I am not doing it in any away,this process is just happening to me!
I watch “Bar” going through deconditioning process through her life journey with her wounds, gifts, stories and life experiences.
And it is fucking amazing to live this life AND to watch it at the same time.
 
Good luck everybody, there is no where to go, it is happening to YOU.
Categories
Manifestors

My first encounter with Human Design

My first encounter with Human Design

For every significant story there is a beginning…
This is mine with Human Design
It has echoed from then until today…
 
I met Human Design for the first time through a friend. When we met the first few times the guy was scattered and talked nonstop. A brilliant interesting guy but seemed slightly lost back then, at least in my view.
 
After two years we met again, and I saw a very different person in front of me. He was calm, grounded, and quiet.
I felt he was alert, sensitive and alive. Completely different from my first experience with him.
I was really shocked and appalled, wondering to myself – “What happened to him?”
I approached him and asked, and he answered: “I am in the Human Design experiment.”
I was very curious because the effect I saw on him was big and significant, therefore it touched me.
The guy gave me a short Human Design reading of my chart while sitting on the grass under the trees.
When he talked about me, about the type I am— “Manifestor” in the mechanics of Human Design, the open centers, and other details – my body lit up right away, and I felt an inner strength and pleasant clarity. It was as if I was returning home. A sense of stability and quiet filled my body.
 
I was surprised and wondered, “How does he know what is going on inside me? How does he echo the experience that I feel is my magical intimate center with such precision?”
That day I was shining. It seemed to me that I had suddenly awakened from a dream, and I remembered who I was. That feeling stayed with me for several days after.
And I knew that this thing is what I was waiting for all the time.
All my life I have known that there is something that exists that makes life organic, in relationships and one with himself. That you can be part of the wonderful system of life and feel connected and led, effortlessly.
Since my youth, I have wondered what makes a day with myself or meeting with another, to be honest, and flowing? Simple.
 
I felt this possibility happening several times and mainly while dancing (dance and movement are my professions and of my big loves), and something inside me was sure that this is not only a mere thing, because it is so simple and evident.
I knew there were “rules” in life that I just do not fully understand yet, but they are here and I can feel them.
I’ve had all sorts of practices, but there was something missing. What is it that I can take anywhere at any time, simple and steady?
 
Then Human Design came along and completed the picture!
 
Finally, what a relief. What a pleasant and calm inner excitement.
 
I began to experiment, to follow the strategy and inner Authority, two practical tools for daily life decision-making that I was given.
The simplicity and the organicness that I felt were beginning to spread and expand into more and more moments of my life, slowly but surely.
Today this is the way for me, and I have devoted myself from the first moment, without doubts or questions because my body echoed, loved and confirmed it again and again.
Even in the most unpleasant moments.
The knight on the white horse arrived, and I got on the horse.
Since then the journey continues and it is fascinating, full, rich, challenging, painfull, human. Moment by moment, day after day. As life is. It is life itself.
 
Today I do not even call it “Human Design”, but it is just my experience—the life that passes through me. My truth.
The same vitality and sense of presence do not need words, but I thank the knowledge that led me to feel it, and that it is an embryonic anchor when necessary.
The experiment shows me the flow of life. Different from everything I imagined or asked, but the stream is me, unique and changing. The direction of life is right for me, just the way it is.
 
Today I am a LYD guide, and I support and empower people in their journey, people who are interested and open to this process. And I am touched every time anew, opening this door, reaching a hand to another because it is a gift I received, and I am so greatful I am able to pass it on.
I wish that everyone will move in their own stream, timing, surrendering completely to who they are.
Categories
Manifestors

Manifest OR Woman

Manifest OR Woman

Well well, it is a very special ride to be a Manifestor type and a woman.
What a beautiful duality to embrace in this short life.
When I just entered the experiment, and mentally I understand the very important aspects of my own nature, and my unique chart – initiating, aloof, repelling, and not available all the time!

I sat down to make two lists:
One of the new women that I am about to discover.
How\who she really is!
Wild, independent, moving in her own timing, needing her space and peace, deep, soft inside, seem rough from the outside.

And another one is about the woman that I am NOT :
I am not available for sex and interaction most of the time – undefined sacral
I am not here to care for other people as a bunny buzzy mother – undefined sacral.
I am not spontaneous and I don’t like surprises – undefined spleen
I am not a fast lady – undefined root
I am not mentally consistent – undefined head and Ajna
And so one…

When I was writing it I was laughing and crying at the same time while making this lists – I could not believe how all these years I was trying to be a woman that I am not! And it was such a relief to say “no more”:
I am a Manifestor and Woman.
I have a different role to play. I cry the voice of change, the voice of an independent and loving woman
My body is soft and feminine, though my energy is powerful, pushing away to bring impact.
I am both Yin and Yang.

I can surrender to the form of a woman completely only when I respect the way I function, the way I move in the world.
No matter how sweet, kind, and soft I might appear to be from the outside, within I am always a lion seeking its meat and peace, and I make sure to remember that.

The stronger I feel my Aura, the more subtle and soft I become.
The more respect I have to my timing the more peaceful I become
The sharper I act as a manifestor the more beautiful and feminine as woman I become.
 
This process does not end for me, it grows, I am finding always more layer about the balance and the dance of being a Manifestor – Yang living force, and a Woman – endless abundance, creation,loving warm vessel that I am
Categories
Circuits

The three streams and their shadow

The three streams and their shadow

In Human Design, there are parts of the body graph that are not colored in, those gates, channels, and centers are in white.
These are called the “not-self”, and these are the places we are here to learn from in this life, but we are not to make decisions according to them.
This is energy that is not available to us constantly, and we receive and amplify it from the environment or from the transits.
It is relatively easy to feel this frequency in open centers, and for those who have a split definition in the gates or channels that connect the definition.
It is important to note that even in the definition of the body graph—everything that is colored in—gates, channels, and centers, all have an unhealthy side or shadow quality.
The quality of this shadow, of course, is influenced by the open places in the graph. Sometimes it can be deceptive, and lead to acting as an authority.

These are indeed qualities that constantly exist and are available to the person, and are a natural part of his body energy. But they can easily express themselves in very different qualities, you could say one that is dirty and blurred.
Just like edited water, the element is the same element, but its quality is different.
When you begin to learn the basic knowledge, there can be a tendency to get confused and act from the mind according to the definitions in the body graph by identifying the knowledge mentally.
Although the energy of sharing, supporting, or empowering is there, it can be misleading and controlled by thought.
For example
“I have a tribal definition – so I have to support…”
Following your strategy, or having a devotion to strategy and authority, allows the streams to appear in front of our consciousness, so we can observe how the quality and difference of each stream is presented in our lives at any time.
Each stream has a keyword that characterizes it –

The collective stream: Sharing

These are people who are meant to share in general. Their abstract experience or a logical pattern can be useful for the future. People who carry Collective channels and gates have a need to share about global issues that belong to everyone, and they are for the whole of humanity. It’s a stream that works in one direction when one shares with the rest.
So what can happen, is that because of pressure from the open centers, there will be a constant urge to share, to tell, to inform everyone, all the time, everywhere.
This can be clearly seen in the global phenomenon in which people share on social media about everything at any moment.
How amazing it is to share nowadays, but it’s worth waiting and being precise about the choice to share.

The questions that can be directed are:
Is the experience completed for me, and so it feels right to share? Did I identify all the details? Did check and examine the pattern in depth, so I am ready to share?
 
The Tribal stream – Support
These are people who are designed to support and receive support in a manner that suits them with different groups of people, according to their tribal definition. They are people who connect through material, spiritual, emotional support and more. It’s a stream that works on reciprocity. Mutual support and exchange.
But what can happen is that due to pressure from the open centers, there will be a constant urge to support and ask for support. Look for it and offer it. But support can be very unhelpful when it is not really needed, or when someone offers support who is not really suited to give it.
The phenomenon is that people who give more than they have and collapse, and those who do not learn to cope alone, become dependent because they seek support so regularly.
The true energy of giving and receiving is vital sustenance when it corresponds to the needs and timing of both sides.

The questions that can be directed are:
Do I feel reciprocity in a situation that calls on me for support? Is it right for me to support this now? What is the quality of support that I am interested in giving and receiving?
 
The individual stream – Empowerment.
These are people who are meant to empower in their presence, their actions, their appearance, and their various choices.
They are people who like to do things in a way that is unique to them. They are busy with themselves, with what is important and interesting to their development. When they follow their path, they are powerful and inspiring for other people to be themselves, to choose their uniqueness and difference. Like the collective stream, it is also a one-way flow. When one is conducted and others are inspired and empowered by their own choices and being.
But what can happen is that because of pressure from the open centers, people will have the urge to show up forcefully and emphasize their peculiarity, to be over-proud and boast about it, to talk about themselves as an example, and will push people to make decisions similar to those that have broken through took.
When in fact they are most impressive when they talk only about their experience, simply and innocently, without even paying attention, or simply being behaving without words at all.
A phenomenon that exists is the obsessive preoccupation with the individual and the way it is seen and experienced by the environment, instead of expressing what interests him, what he is busy with, and what is important to his personal development.

The questions that can be directed are:
Am I trying to be different? Do I want others to see my way? Is it important for me to emphasize my unique way and choice?
There are different expressions for each shadow, of course, these are set in relation to many other additional factors in each one’s design.

The ones I mentioned come from personal observation of my experience, and the identification of a number of people around me who I know of their design.
I carry three channels, one from each stream, and all three are connected to the throat.
I notice easily how the beautiful, special and touching quality of each stream can transform its skin.
How sharing can be superficial, how support can be neither meaningful nor harmful to both sides, how empowerment can be empty of content and presence.

Each of us has these streams in the body graph. I suggest paying attention to their clean qualities and their shadow qualities, being sensitive and inquisitive and letting them teach us.
So in each moment these key notes will have a different meaning, variety, and depth when they appear, so that they can pass naturally without effort or thoughts through us.
 
Anyone interested in a deep process of identifying the shadow and light in the gates the wisdom of “Genes Keys” can inspire, illuminate, and direct the layers of frequencies inherent in each gate.
Categories
Uncategorized

Manifestor & Impact

Manifestor & Impact

Manifestor & Impact
 
This is one of my favorite topics about the Manifestor’s life. I am inspired to see how the aura has its ripples. The aura is impacting. The aura that repels me can teach me about myself.
Manifestors Bring Change

As a Manifestor, I am here to bring change. The aura is pushing, moving, and translating change. The impact is really the aim. It’s the effect, the direct result of my presence. If I am, as a Manifestor, say nothing, I am still impacting. If I say something, I am still impacting. If I am moving, if I am sitting, if I am still, my presence, my absence is impacting. Imagine the water drop that goes into the water and makes ripples. This is our presence. This is affecting our environment deeply. Even if I go to the supermarket and someone is moving close by, or in the line, there is someone in front of me or behind me, once this person enters my aura field, they feel that something is being activated inside of their body. I can just see it. I can feel it.
Sometimes, most of the time, it’s unconscious, but once people come into my aura, they feel a massive movement within them. Things are clicking in, they feel they need to do something, or suddenly things are ready to move. Sometimes it’s very obvious, but sometimes it’s not. It’s even kind of mysterious. This is what I do to other people, and this is part of the reason why so many people feel uncomfortable, or, conversely, very attracted to me, because they know that once they are close to me, they are going to feel movement or change. I know a lot of people in my life who have wanted my presence. They wanted to talk to me. They wanted me to be there. They wanted to just stand near me, so something will move within them.
 
It’s Not Mental
 
Please try not to look at it on a mental level. It’s not like I need to do this on purpose. It’s not like I need to be with people in order to help them. It’s just the nature of who I am. It’s important to consciously understand what I am doing to others in my presence, or in my absence when I talk or don’t talk. I am in an away ticking bomb. a volcano. a tsunami. It’s impressive. It can be for my own good, because when a volcano explodes, it’s actually cleaning the earth, allowing new plants to grow. It can be a tsunami that destroys a whole city, but either way, it’s having an impact.
 
How Does it Work?
 
What I would like for me to see is how I am observing and taking in information from my surroundings, because the impact is a very good tool for a Manifestor to see and understand its own inner world.
As a Manifestor, I am not here to search for who I am. My aura is not busy trying to know itself. Mechanically this is for the Generators. Generators want to know where to put all their energy! And by this to know – who they are, to find more and more things about themselves. A Manifestor’s awareness when is correct is busy with seeing who they impact and how they impact.
When I met Human Design, of course, it helped me a lot. However, the very next thing I felt was how much I wanted to give this. I didn’t want to keep it to myself. I think this is one of the most generous feelings that Manifestors have, and it’s embodied inside the aura. If as a Manifestor I am busy trying to figure out who I am, or if I am caught trying to analyze all of the things in my chart, for me it’s the wrong frequency because I am trying to be in a state which is really not correct for me.
My embodied state is for creation, giving, and seeing my impact. It doesn’t mean that I cannot know, feel, or have internal processes. Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that I should be oblivious and just see how I affect people, but rather to see how I affect people in relation to my inner world.
My Manifestor Experience
I’ll give you a very personal example. I was living by myself in Europe for a few years. I was very far from my family and friends. I didn’t have a constant impact until I started to teach dance classes. In this class, I learned about what the group needed, as well as how I was teaching and what my method was. I learned all of this from the group. I really saw how they were reacting to my teaching. I saw when they didn’t understand me or when they were afraid of me. I started to understand when they were tired because I wasn’t excited about my own class and I wasn’t passionate about what I was giving.
I ask my body some questions of awareness, sometimes the answers are not nice to hear, but I don’t care about appearing ok, I care about transforming, and sometimes it requires to see the dark sides of my impact. so I can improve and grow
  • What is the reaction I receive?
  • How is my relationship going?
  • How do I feel with what I leave behind?
  • How do I feel before, while and after my initiation?
  • When things go smoothly through the body, and when it’s only the mind that makes a good story on what is happening?
Impact in my view is a great tool to use in order to learn about myself.
Looking outside to understand deeply the inside.
Categories
Uncategorized

20 Things happened – Deconditioning

20 Things that happen - Deconditioning

20 Things that happened to me when I entered Human Design Deconditioning!

I felt directed to keep my process fresh in my awareness:

As we know, there are so many ways to take in information according to each one’s definition and variables. Some are more acoustic, some visual, some social. Some are focused, some are not. S&A reveals each one it’s own.

  1. Letting go of it completely for one or two days.
  2. Hanging my body-graph in a place I can look at it regularly.
  3. Walking in nature while hearing audio lectures.
  4. Interacting in voice conversations with people who are the same type as I am.
  5. Interacting with people who are in the deconditioning process too.
  6. Just doing NOTHING.
  7. Talking to my personal guide once a month, more or less.
  8. Watching videos of people I resonate with their voice.
  9. Writing, documenting my own process.
  10. Laying down and wondering…
  11. Hanging sentences that support me in my room..
  12. Writing on my hand from my Aura/Inner authority.
  13. Sleeping a lot.
  14. Talking About HD in my own words and vocabulary with a person that does not know it at all.
  15. Saying to myself “you are not doing it, you are doing it…!!”
  16. Studying advanced courses.
  17. Not talking at all in social interaction.
  18. Making jokes to myself,  about myself. “I may appear such a strange creature right now….!!”
  19. Long warm baths…
  20. Saying to myself – 7 years it’s, 7 years; not more not less.

And repeat.

Better get used to it.

No blame no-fault.

And repeat.

 

Categories
Uncategorized

Emotional Authority

Emotional Authority

Emotional Authority. 

Hoo… 

I love this one.

The queen of time. 

The source of desire.

The potential for incredible depth.

All of it lays in the arms of patience.

In the ability to live the emotional range and its variety.

The low, grey, hopeless, and heavy moments.

The excitement, expectation, light and joyful moments.

And all the nuances in between. 

To pass within and through them, without the need to tell a story, knowing why they are there and why they change. 

Just to see their motion, passing through the chemistry of the physical body.

And then comes the moment that life brings one to the quiet shore.

There is no high happy feeling and no sad heavy feeling. 

The nervousness has gone.

A sense of clarity appears. 

You know that it’s where the rivers turn.

Where the water flow is going.

That after being up and after being low.

There is a place and time that exposes itself to one. 

Emotional clarity is present.

That is worth the wait, living inside an unknown boat for a while, and being rocked by the waves. 

One has collected details, views, and feelings, from all parts along the way.

The decision made itself. 

So the gift and the challenge is to wait.

To cultivate patience.

To accept and allow to feel everything while doing absolutely anything.

To fall in love with the unknown.

To be the ocean, the waves, and the flat horizon. All at once.

Until the shore appears.

And one can place its two fists on warm embracing sand.